nothing has it is

I’m tired

Tired of smiling when I don’t want to smile
Tired of faking I’m happy
Tired of living in the shadows

Every smile of her makes me smile and cry
Every word of her makes me whisper and scream
Every touch of her makes me warm and scars
I can’t live like this anymore

What am I supposed to do?
Am I supposed to live?
Am I supposed act like this?

I want to you next to me
I need you next to me
But this pain and sorrow makes me fade away

Maybe suicide is the silence way to get this over
Maybe run away is the worst way to get this over
But I can’t stop thinking in you

I’m buried in this hole of questions without answers
I’m crucified in this cross of shame
I’m written in the bible of misery


Your heart wasn’t in me when I needed you
Your smile wasn’t there when I was crying
Your touch wasn’t there when I was hurt

Every time I hear “ love” my eyes turns red
Has the blood I bleeded when my heart
Was pulled off of me when you were gone

Every time I tried to kiss you
You just pushed me away
Like I was a fucking toy

Every time I tried to be next to you
You just ran away from me
To don’t hear my words

Should I live like this?
Or should I fade away?

My poems aren’t the same
They are full of shame
And full of shit

talking to the mirror

I can’t accept this pain anymore!
This memories curses my mind
Pictures of her appearing in front
Of my eyes!

His screams….I can hear it…
Full of pain and sorrow
Full of despair and paranoia
But I can’t touch him I can’t kiss him…

Her fucking smiles are fucking my brains!!
Her fucking laughs are fucking destroying my ears!!

His screams are making me sad
And making me praying for his soul
To die and get out of this world of misery
A bullet in the head…
A knife in his heart…

This crap it’s unconceivable!
So many tears so many screams
To receive fucking nothing from her
Breaking apart everything I felt about her!

He can’t understand my mind…
He can’t understand my heart…
Not even a kiss will make him smile once again…
Not even a goodbye will make him understand…

Sorrow sinks deep inside my blood
Not even her arms around me
Will make me get out from this hole
The hole of misery
The hole of darkness
The hole I call hell

I’m his light
But I can’t give him light
I’m his hope
But I can’t pull him up
I must run away before it’s too late

Please don’t forget me
I can’t let you see me crying
I can’t let you see me falling in depression
I can’t let you see me stitching my heart with 666 stitches




666 memories and I can’t let them falling on me
I can’t feel it again
I can’t drop a tear anymore
I can’t fall…

I loved you until the end
Until your heart turned to stone
And forgot about me
Forgot all those moments of pureness
All those moments of happiness
But now you are living in darkness

Screw you all this darkness it’s a last hope
Life moves on can’t stay the same
Stop worrying
Stop loving
Stop living!!

Stop fucking with my mind!!!
Stop fucking with my heart!!!
Let me save myself from paranoia!!!
Let me save myself of depression!!!
Let me save from this mirror!!!
Let me save from you!!!

You can’t save from myself
I’m your life
I’m your love
I’m your muse

You’re my fall
You’re my disgrace
You’re my muse of death
You’re my shadow

Why so many hate?
Why so many screams?

Why so many decisions?
Why so many pain you craved in my heart?

This pain is the solution
The solution to my survival
Understand me
Try to live without me





You’re not my life
You’re my death
My ghost
The ghost I can’t feel fear
The ghost with the eyes of an angel
The angel of death

Try to see my scattered flesh burning
Try to see my tears turning into ice
Try to see my smile fading
Try to feel my heart stopping because of a dead love

Try to see my body full of scars
Try to see my eyes turning red
Try to see my hands full of blood of your son
Try to feel my anger emerging every time I look to his corpse…


Try to kill me!

pull the trigger

I’m screaming bleeding and crawling for you!!
I’m screaming your name
666 times every nightmare
But you still don’t hear me

I’m bleeding every time
This knife craves in my back
Writing your name
But you still don’t read it

I’m crawling in the ground
In the middle of the darkness
But you still don’t pull me up

My minds is blasting
Fucking ghost fucking with my mind!
Always whispering ways to kill you

I don’t know if all this is real or fake
Looking at you turning your back to me
When I was looking to her grave

Looking at you smoking every time
My tears were falling on the ground
Without looking at me

Listening to you speaking about him
And feeling hatred burning in my heart

These memories will always curse me
Your insignificant little heart can’t understand
My anger and my sadness

Your fucking eyes can’t see me burning
And dying in the flames of the pit of hell


Fuck this I’m pulling the trigger!!!

whispers in the shadows

It’s dark ….
Too dark to keep these feelings inside of me

My face is dry….
What does it mean?
Does it mean I’m dying?
Does it mean I’m human?
Am I a human being?


I don’t feel like a human being!!!
Scars on my body made by my fingers…
This pain I can’t scratch….
Its feels like a snake biting my back

My nails are broken and full of blood
Everyday trying to pull myself up in this hole….
A dark hole full of shadows whispering HER name!!!!
FUCK I can’t think with memories of her always torturing me

Why are my tears black?
Is it because my soul is fading to black?
Happiness is gone to the last….
All my thoughts turned in death…
These tears are pointless….
They won’t bring her back….

Because this is my GRAVE!!
This is my PAIN!!!
This is my SHAME!!!

The moon is my light always with the grim
Singing tales of a heart killed by seven knifes

This is my heart…666 stitches and still black tears comes
Every night I look at her photograph….

All those seven knifes comes back

All the sorrow
All the jealous
All the hate
All the sadness
All the anger
All the doubt
All the pain




My lips are dry and dark
So many poisons I tasted every time
I kissed her lips

The muse of death
Prayed her last wish

My prison
My punishment
My eternal love

The love I so many care
The love I wish it would be the eternal desire

I wish her smile
I wish her touch
I wish her kiss
I wish her love!!!


But if my punishment is loving you
Than I will accept my fate and my will
I will love you and desire you
If it means to live in this prison of dark walls
With the ghosts you cursed…
Being me the cold blooded dead poet
I will write their words…
The tales of love
The tales of eternal depression

My tears will float this hole!!
My screams will tear these walls down!!!
My hate will curse this prison!!!

My corpse will be remembered has the one
You loved without kissing the lips of the cold blooded dead poet

the love strike again

I promised to myself, I never fall in love like this.. My heart can’t stand like this anymore! I should stop this pain and sorrow. And the people who I thought were my friends just are stupid. How she doesn’t understand the love I have with me and how I care about she. “Nem que todos os anjos mais santos a ajudem, estará sempre cega para ver o mundo que a rodeia. Que mais tenho que fazer para a alertar e avisar dos perigos da escuridão… que incompleta o seu ser. N quero ser o mau da fita, mas o tempo urge e tenho a sensação que o meu diário já devia ter sido aberto à mais tempo, mas também a ingenuidade dela que a rodeia…deixa muito a desejar” I can’t say her name, but all the seven letters will ever be mark in my skin, in my mind, in my heart! How can I believe in love if the only think he gave me was pain and rage. The thing that bother me more is the fact that she don’t say nothing nice, only to blow my head with more questions! FUCK YOU!!! Don’t ever say anything to me again!

city of the damned

This is my city…
Creeping memories of nights staring
At the window watching a raper raping
and Innocent teenager and pointing the finger
To me saying”you tell someone you’re next”

Everytime I get out of home the smell
Of a corpse next to the door
A drunk…
A poor soul…thinking that he can escape problems by getting drunk

While I am walking l I see the next door
women with her son on her arms screaming for help
” please help me my son doesnt breathe !”
No one helps…for what? She’s not gonna pay them so no one cares

Along the way a guy runs agaisnt an old granny…
He puts her in the ground and steal her purse…
There she is crying for someone to get the fucker…
No one helps…the cops are eating theyr donuts so they cant help….

Across the street you can see a little girl with blood on her shirt…
Her sister was ran over by a car…hit and run…asshole…
She is an orfan….her sister was everything she got…until now…
She is calling for help but the cops said”fuck off little bitch!”

So many tears…there she is holding her teddy bear sitted in the corner hiding in the shadows
At night…

Whores smoking her cigarettes with her skirts and tops
Waving to every car…

Idiots…thinking they were going to be models….

Her pimps stealing all the money…and holding the hand of a
Little inocent teenager crying with blood on her legs…first time…
with a fat prick hitting her until she fakes pleasure….

Behind the restaurant theres a homeless with his arm full of blood
Addicted asshole…every days dying with pleasure….cant wait to see him die with an overdose

People ask me” why so much hate?”
I haven’t got any reason to love…
Hate this city…full of sin…
Hate this people…full of ignorance…
Hate this world….so full of shit…
Hate myself…for letting the only one I love dying while she gets raped in front of my window…

picture of her

The moon is the reason for my vision to exist
Because it lights up every dark soul around me
Every time I turn around the moon is there
Showing me the steps of crying souls
Who died in the darkness lost in madness

The crows are the reason for my ears to hear
The screams of the demons calling for me
To enter in theyr world of sin and desire
Creating illusions in my mind and soul
Telling spells but the songs of the crows
Makes me continue my road

The road of her luxurius heart
A heart with a rose craved in her memories
Memories of a love dead in sorrow and sadness
Knifes in her heart by her betrayal

Her eyes crying tears of fear and pain
But her beauty covers her sorrow
Her green eyes reviving my life
Her lips full of lust

Creating wishes of me kissing her
The deadly sin of loving a muse
The muse of darkness
The muse of hell

The existence of so much love
Crawling in her grave
She is gone but this love
Will live in our past lifes

The Night Begins...

The history of my lonely day of my live
I just want to cry, but this it’s mine
I just want to bleed, but this it’s mine

And this darkness around me:
don’t let me fly,
don’t let my words came off,
don’t let the sun shine

And this shadows underneath me:
turn myself in dark,
like a broken glass
watch each steps of mine

And this dark clouds on top of me:
drop tears that never dry
make me sad, like a fake face
will the blotch be fine

My head it’s full with so much darkness, heavy with so muck shadows and free with so many clouds. Is this Happiness?

Just to think that The Night just begins…

the reject

I will never forget
the day you went home
without giving one last kiss

the kiss I wished so much
from you my darling
the kiss I was expecting
from the one I love

I still remenber the rain
falling in my face
covering my tears
the tears I cried when you left

a lonely night without
sleeping only thinking
in you and in your smile
when you weren't looking at me

I never wanted anyone
more than I want you
but the only thing
I got is sadness and rejection

I can't see in the darkness
without you to give light to my world
I can't feel warm
without your body next to me

I can't live with this rejection
I'm not a toy
I'm no ones reject

I don't deserve to cry
for your smile
I don't deserve to kill
for your touch

I only want one kiss
to forget I'm your reject

erotic apokalypse

the moon is shining to her grave
the witch whispering spells
from the black book
reviving her soul from the dead


darkness falls covering every light
around the world

the sea turned in blood
emerging all the corpses


the wind is awaking the ghosts
of the past screaming tales of the devil

her body and her soul has been revived
for the sacrament of the gothic romance

her grave falls while she cames out
to the outside
the chilling cold is around us
her arms touches me
making my skin dying


her kiss poisoning my lips
her breath killing my lungs
her teeth penetrating my neck
drinking my blood

her desire of sadistic sex
is cursing my mind
and taking command of my body

the erotic ritual reborning the apokalypse
our blood sinking the trees
destroying the cemetary
the deads watching our
bodys dying with desire and orgasms
our grave made of dust and ashes

this is the erotic apokalypse
the fall of the human kind

priests punished for they're
desire of little children

with they're heads burning in our bed
whores fucked by the slaves
of the god of lepor around us

the angels killed by demons
with they're blood falling in
our bodies

the erotic apokalypse has arrived

the mistress of snow

The mistress of snow

A silent killer of the night

A godness only I know

A soul of a killer
Her minds full of deaths

Eyes of a sinner
her body full of pain
Should I feel fear or love?

should I kiss her or
kill this mistress who
curses the forest?

the trees around her
whispers her words
full of darkness and love

the wind making her hair
floating in the air
creating shadows around me

her skin white and dry
as her victims eyes

her hair dark as
her impure soul

her voice curses my hears

with whispers with her thougths

of the way she will kill me

my eyes getting blinded
with her dark beauty

and when her hands touches me

my skin gets dry as a stone

her teeth bitting my neck
sucking my blood and
my pure soul

I watch myself getting killed

but I will never forget I got killed

by the one I love

cold blooded dead girl

Why did I killed her?
She was the only one
Who ever smiled at me

She was the only one
Who always was there for me
She was the one who kissed me


But that doesn’t matter now
Because I have her heart in my hand
Don’t ask me how
But I killed her with pleasure

Why don’t I cry?
Why do I only feel sorrow?
Please god just tell my why

I look at her knowing
I will never fell her lips
Kissing me

Only now I feel sorry and redemption
Only now I can feel tears
Only now I feel pain in my heart
Only now I created fears

I remember those days
You look at me with your
Beautiful eyes knowing
I was the one you love

I remember the first time
I kissed your lips
Knowing you will always be
The one I love


You will always
Be my cold blooded dead girl
The one I will always love
In life and death

wake up

So many times I told her to wake up
In that Picture:
I’m tired to see you like this
Don’t put your head down no more
I’m breathless to see your hair in the floor
Don’t try to cry the tears that are miss(ed)

Why are you falling to the darkness?
The mirror that you still hang on
The perfect image that will be gone
Why are you insisting to live inside of sadness?

You spend your time looking at the clock
Hoping the dream never finish
You’re dying in one lest wish
Hoping the memories keep lock(ed)

If those wings make you fell free
In eye for eye make you fell frightful
If fly make you beautiful
In my mind, you are not from me

I said one’s and I repeat again
Stop the time, live freely
You make your one loveliness
Shut the mouth of the others

Wake up of this wonderful nightmare!

trash in crash

you thought that you could hide your tears in rain
your eyes scream for help, but you were to weak
you close your heart and cover yourself with pain
how much I beg you to live, but you will do it again
I know that you like to be the center piece, but you come your peak
You may think that I´m your other side, but I didn´t want this end

In my bedroom:
Sitting in my chair, looking at the white wall, and try to imagine your picture there...God, you´re extremely hot.
Sitting in my chair, looking at the light, and try to understand why I need to close my eyes when I´m with you In bed, and counting the minutes to hug you again, counting the seconds to touch in your lips.

Butterfly

I was laid down in Eve's garden

Looking at the sky until the

Moment I saw

a beautiful butterfly

She had the most

Beautiful eyes I've ever seen

She had the most amazing

Smile I've ever received

Her wings were full

Of lust and brightness

Her hair was so soft

And filled with careness

When I touched her skin

She was so warm

When I touched her chest

I felt her heart pounding

My eyes almost got blinded

With so much beauty

Around her

When she touched me

I felt chills

Around my spine

Like I never felt before

When she kissed me

My mind was

About to blast

And my heart

Was pounding so fast

She is my butterfly

She is my Eve

She is my muse

She is my love

The angel

here I am in the darkness
earing screams from the impure souls
tasting the dark blood from haters

there she is in the sky
she has the purest of hearts the brightest soul
Her eyes are shining like sapphires in eve's garden
her hair is like leth's river making me lost in her beauty

I crawled into her feet with my body full of blood
with my eyes full of pain

she touched my face covering me with her brigthness
she whispered me her words filled with love and softness
she cleanned my filthyness she made me feel alive again
with her pureness the clearness around me

the way she smiles at me

the way she touched me makes me feel something

the way she looks at me I never felt before
the way she kissed me

Is this what angels call love?

is this what it means to be in love? This questions makes me

cry because I know I will never see her again because

I'm a slave from the Devil's bride she doesn't deserve an impure soul like me
she deserves the purest of hearts the purest angel

I'm an unforgiven soul
I deserve to swim in acheron's river I deserve to burn in
for all eternity the eternal fire of hell

But in this night the chilling cold
covered by a mist around us

This is the night the only night when Hell freezed

The matrimonial of an angel and a demon

The commemoration of the erotic ritual

I touched the her body filled of beauty
I kissed the ecllipsing lust of her lips
I bitted her neck to drink her pure blood

this is the night I will never forget

this is the night when I found out what is love

I need to see you, I kill for you

My brain is in countdown to blast,
I’m with so much longing
I need to see you, fast
Why I fall in love by a Miss
How I know you aren’t faking
give me one last kiss

Your eyes remember me
how beautiful can a girl be
At first time I see you
(I)Didn’t know what to do

How many pens will be needed?
to rite on your heart
How many doors will be open?
to enter in your world apart

Don’t be sad
With all I say
Because I, just wont to see you
Because, I, just wont to see you again

she

why does my heart pounds for you

when you´re next to me?

why does my body feels

warm when you touch me?

why my tears stop when you laugh?

why I can´t stop dreaming of you?

why do I want to kiss you?

why do I cry when you´re gone?

why don't I tell you: "I love you"?

these words are my life and my soul

you´re the reason for my existence

Why are you so beautiful?

why I`m dreaming with you in every reverie ?

why I don´t stop to think in your face ?

why I cannot erase that night ?

why wasn´t it cold enough ?

Why are you so beautiful ?

why is my mind´s diary opening ?

Why God gave you those eyes ?

Why is your tuft so silken ?

why my heart and head are crashing ?

Why, why, why are you so gorgeous ?

Why are you so perfect to me ?

I never could lie to you

I am writing what I see

I hope that you like what I do...

Memories of a cold blooded dead poet

In an endless dark
I saw a light
from your
shinning eyes

In an endless sadness
I heared from
a beautiful laugh
from you mouth

In an endless war
I felt peace in
My heart when
I was next to you

you'r not a ghost
you are a muse
you are my
muse of the night